ibblackman

Some one actually commented on my blog, they said that they are looking forward to reading what I post. For my one reader out there here is my new post, feel free to tell your friends, family, and enemies, I would love all the feedback I can get. But I digress; let’s get into this new topic, my black card being revoked.

For those of you who do not know what I mean by black card, here is a short explanation. It is not the black card from American Express that all the rappers talk about having, it is what shows other people you are “black”. It is issued at birth to African-American people, noticed I said African- American people, because you aren’t born “black” you have to earn it, kind of like the punch cards you get a restaurants, after so many punches you become officially “black”. How do you earn the right to be called officially “black”, well you can learn from my mistakes after I go through the reasons as to why they are going to revoke my black card, just do the opposite. Oh yes, your black card can be revoked, let this be a warning, please learn from my mistakes!!

I have always been on the cusp of being officially “black”, but as I get older I am moving further away from the cusp and headed back to African-American status. Why would I want to be “black” you ask? Well I am glad you did; there are a bunch of benefits to being “black”. First there is CPT (Colored People Time). Admit it black people are always late, have you ever been to a black owned business or a place where a black person manages? 9:00 is when the sign says they open, your watch says 9:00,but they are not open yet, weird. Here is a trick to help you out, if you have an appointment with a black person or you are waiting for them to open a business, add 15 minutes to whatever time is posted or you where told. But that only works Monday thru Friday, on weekends, your guess is as good as mine. Second, is the whole slavery issue. Sure it happened over 100 years ago, but you can still play that card for all it is worth today. Shoot a white person, slavery made me do it, rob a bank, slavery made me do it, speeding, slavery made me do it, beat your wife, slavery made me do it, jaywalking, 400 years of slavery damn it!! Who is going to challenge it? Next up, lots of friends and support. When is the last time you saw a single black person by themselves at the Mall, sporting event, concert, etc.? Black people travel in packs, why you ask? So you always have someone to back up your point of view and your ego, here is an experiment (Please do at your own risk, I assume no responsibility for any resulting action that takes place) go to a pack of black people and disagree with one of them, it doesn’t matter what the topic is, just disagree and see how quickly you are swarmed on by the pack. Will violence ensue, depends on what you disagree about, the stupider topic, i.e. shoes, food, sports, the more likely it is that someone will get shot. But don’t worry, 2 out of 3 times you are more likely to be hit by a stray bullet from one of these disagreements, so if you are actually part of one you are rather safe. You can always be late, the slavery card, and a strong support group. Why would I not want to be black, but alas my card is in danger.

I decided to break this into two parts it became a bigger tpoic then a I thought, please give me you feedback on what I have so far. Part 2 is coming soon…stay tuned, tell a friend.

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